A lunch of one's own

I just finished doing one of my favorite House Wife things - cooking myself lunch. Most days, I just eat a sandwich or a microwave meal, so I don't have to deal with dishes or worry about cleanup, but once a week or so, I actually cook myself something. It could be as complicated as macaroni and cheese from scratch, with a roux and lots of freshly shredded cheese, or as simple as today's lunch - Velveeta Shells and Cheese with some diced tomatoes mixed in. (Sense a theme? I love mac and cheese and Tony doesn't, so if I'm going to cook it, I have to at lunch time.)

You see, for me, cooking lunch is so delightful because it is the ultimate selfish act. When I cook dinner for us or for company, I spend a lot of time thinking about what Tony or my guests will want, what they can or cannot eat, whether or not they are on a diet, how fancy their palettes are, etc. Once I had a girlfriend over for dinner who was a vegetarian and I spent hours researching recipes for a vegetarian-friendly southwestern corn chowder to go with my favorite roasted red pepper and manchego cheese sandwiches, because my usual prepared variety had chicken broth in it. And that was when I was working full-time. Now, I'd probably plan far enough in advance to grow the corn myself.

There is never a night in our house when I just throw open the door of the fridge and figure out what we'll eat in that moment. I plan menus at least a week in advance, so I'll have all the ingredients, Tony will have leftovers on the appropriate weekday for lunch and I can possibly create more meals out of the leftover components or ingredients. Spontaneity in my kitchen only happens out of desperation, when I haven't planned or shopped enough and there is a night when I don't have a specific recipe in mind. This usually means spaghetti or hot ham and cheese sandwiches for dinner.

But when I get ready for lunch at home, it is a whole different story. I open the cupboards and browse, I poke into the far reaches of the freezer to see what is hiding and I often spend a long time contemplating my options before beginning to cook. This is part of the fun of being home - I can choose whatever I like, without consulting anyone. My cravings are boss. For instance, I bought this box of mac and cheese two weeks ago on sale, because I like to have some quick and easy options in the house for nights when my schedule gets all screwed up. Today, I woke up craving some serious carbs and I'm always in the mood for cheese - just ask my cholesterol levels - so when I saw it languishing on the dining room table, I pounced. (If you want to know why my dry goods are hanging out on the table, I'll give you the simple explanation. We are moving and I don't have room for everything after I put half our worldly goods in the storage unit in the basement. The extra groceries are now squatting on any unoccupied real estate they can find. I am waiting for Mrs. Butterworth to set up tents and portable toilets in my living room.)

Once I started the water boiling, I thought it might be nice to add some diced tomatoes to the mix, so I dug around in a cupboard until I found a can. I was right, it is delicious. Ten minutes of cooking was never so satisfying. What would feel like a cop-out meal for dinner become a decadent lunch for one. The best part is that I didn't even have to worry about saving half for anyone else. I can eat as much as I want and enjoy every guilt-free bite.

I'm just sad that today is Friday and I won't be able to have lunch alone again until Monday. Ham and swiss with lots of mayo and some potato chips on whole-grain bread sounds fabulous.